Saturday evening was a gathering of thoughts, artwork, stories, friends...mom,
all into one inner space known to the world as The Backroom Gallery. The 3rd anniversary of Art Wauk in downtown Waukegan, Illinois.
How exciting to get all of these things together in one spot and put them on display for THE ENTIRE WORLD TO SEE??! What am I thinking? Who is this that has invaded my brain and said, "Come on in!"
It was a little scary once I was existing in the moment. No where to run. It was a room full of my emotional therapy on display. Did I think I was ready to face it all?
I guess so. Yes.
I ate one of Cassandra's insanely delicious mint Oreo cupcakes, reapplied my way dark lipstick, pulled up my big girl panties, and smiled. 
The night was amazing. More than that. I can't describe.
I was asked questions I didn't realize I would be answering or explaining what my purpose was or why I paint the way I do.
Unexpected, on the spot, raw. I unlocked it all and the words flowed for hours.
More than once I felt myself telling parts of my life story and people were listening.
That's such a wild experience. I've never been a teacher, or a public speaker or even had a speaking part in a high school musical but here you couldn't get me to shut up. The evening just flew by.
I've never experienced anything like this before.
When I finally sat down with my "fetch it" girl, Linda (aka my best friend), and we had a chance to relax she asked me, "So what was the best part? What was the worst part?"
The best part: Watching the reaction to my artwork. People actually got it! They liked it, thought it was really cool, talked about it, took pictures because they wanted to remember it. Asked me questions about it.
The best part: Watching the reaction to my artwork. People actually got it! They liked it, thought it was really cool, talked about it, took pictures because they wanted to remember it. Asked me questions about it.
The worst part: I had ideas prior to the show what the worst part would be. People walking in and gasping then walking out. Comments like "I could do that" or "this is crap!" I even felt like I would have a really difficult time letting a piece go if it sold. None of that happened. I had no "worst parts" to talk about.
Some interesting things happened like a couple of guys (privately) referring to female symbolism in one of my paintings as "You think it's a scratch and sniff?" Hahaha! I wish I would have heard that conversation, I would have invited them to try it and see, with my camera in hand of course.
Another time was the observation that one man made during our conversation. He referred to this pivotal piece I had created, at the time I believed to be my last painting, but then lived beyond my "expiration date." The shift in my technique and subject in paintings after that showed a renewed spirituality and life. Maybe something I didn't even notice myself. Hearing some positive critiques from others artists like this was priceless.
Some thoughts I took with me that afternoon before the show started:
Nobody has to like my artwork but me. I made it for myself.
I'm not planning on selling anything tonight, I'm just putting it out there.
I'm dressed the way I want to be even if I do look like a 40 year old teenager.
I'm proud of myself for being brave.
I'm nervous as Hell and that's OK because its a normal thing to feel like this. I'm alive!
I can't wait to do it all again!
XoXo -The Art Girl
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